“Jon & Kate Plus 8”: Get thee to therapy

OK, so now we *know* (as much as we’re going to know right now, anyway) what’s going on between Jon and Kate Gosselin.

Things were all so simple then.

It was all so simple then...

And really, who can’t blame Jon for having a hard time adjusting to being in the spotlight 24/7? As if taping a show in your home several times a week isn’t enough, the entire family has to deal with being recognized everywhere they go. Even actors get to leave their work on the set. The Gosselins’ home is the set. It’s like there’s absolutely no escape.

“We don’t have any privacy at all,” Jon declared.

Except maybe at his mom’s house? Helping mom with her broken foot was as good a reason as any for Jon to get some much-needed space. And while he didn’t directly address the photograph in question – taken with two college coeds and Jon looking quite inebriated – it’s easy to feel empathy for him.

“If I go out, people know I go out and photograph it and do everything they gotta do to do something about it,” he said in the season finale. “But that’s tough for me.”

But he did directly address what’s been bugging him, and I was impressed at how eloquently he put it:

“It’s tough for me. I can’t be Jon – I have to be ‘Jon & Kate Plus 8.’ Which is a real hard thing for me. I still haven’t come to grips with it.”

While Jon’s been struggling with his notoriety, it’s clear Kate has embraced and – dare I say? – thrived on hers.

“I’m loving what we’re doing,” Kate said.

There’s no doubt about that, either. Kate’s the one penning books, Kate’s the one traveling around the country and giving speeches. But that’s not really surprising, because Kate’s always made lemonade out of lemons. Jon, meanwhile, is stuck home with eight children while she’s off working. And, as he pointed out, it’s been a tough adjustment for him working at home because – again – there’s no escape. He’s stuck there 24/7. And on the rare occasions when he does manage to get away – caring for his mom must be like a vacation at this point! – he’s faced with rumors that he’s cheating on Kate and that they’ve separated.

It must be extremely frustrating to know that you’re never just Jon Gosselin, that your identity is wrapped up with your entire family’s. How does one not have an identity crisis?

So while the rumors of Jon cheating on Kate don’t seem to be true, it’s clear that they are both in very different places. How does a couple deal with a situation like this, where one spouse is enjoying their life and the other is miserable? Is there any way to compromise without one totally having to give up up what they need/enjoy?

At this point, only a therapist can help them determine that. In the meantime, Kate sounded optimistic about a fifth season, and Jon was leery.

“Maybe we’ll be back, maybe we won’t,” he said.

12 Comments

  1. avagacser said,

    March 31, 2009 at 11:32 pm

    I do agree that they’re running out of ideas. Every week it’s a trip here or there. That’s because their day-to-day lives aren’t that interesting anymore. The kids are getting older, and they’re more independent. It used to be fascinating to simply watch how Jon & Kate coped and handled everyday responsibilities. Now it’s more like everything’s one long, 30 minute commercial for the Please Touch Museum or Whirlpool Duet washer/dryers.

    I also agree that “Table for 12” is more meat and potatoes. And they’re from my home state of New Jersey!

  2. wen said,

    March 31, 2009 at 11:26 pm

    This show was originally about the kids and now it’s all about Kate. Kate Kate Kate. The show has run it’s course. They obviously have enough money to support their eight kids. I’d rather watch the show about 12. They are more real and down to earth facing real challenges and not living in million dollar houses and traveling everywhere just for the ratings. Reality shows should be just that. Jon and Kate are no longer reality but showbiz now. You might as well be watching Britany or Angelina Jolie…

  3. gingerbread said,

    March 31, 2009 at 8:44 pm

    Everyone should know that with fame comes sacrifice- And just admit it Jon- once you started having a good time- you didn’t think about the outcome- like no one else does when they start partying. Live & let live- your a normal guy just with 8 kids. Other fathers do the same thing- only you can afford it!

  4. Marilyn Rasmussen said,

    March 29, 2009 at 3:14 am

    Hello Jon & Kate . Now the kids are getting older. Maybe Jon can go back to work now. For men need that . Makes them feel like a man .. Hope and pray everything will work out. And we get to see you all season -5- PS .
    Kate please get that hair style you got for Jon when you had a tummie tuck. It was beautiful and you looked very classie. god bless you all
    Marilyn

  5. avagacser said,

    March 28, 2009 at 10:17 am

    I agree, Bethany. J&K was entertaining for a long time, and that’s why it built up such a loyal following. I think the “fake feel” you’re referring to is because of two things: a) they’re running out of ideas. Every episode now has them going here or there, instead of just focusing on them getting through the day. That probably has a lot to do with the kids getting older, and it will probably continue to get worse, too. b) product placements are out of control. Did you notice the push for Allstate insurance in last week’s episode? C’mon! There was no reason why they needed to show Jon at the computer talking about how he needs to get insurance when the episode is about them going to see the Harlem Globetrotters. I still think Kate singing about her Whirlpool Duet washing machines was the worst so far! https://avagacser.wordpress.com/2009/02/17/stop-with-the-product-placements-jon-kate-plus-8/

  6. Bethany said,

    March 27, 2009 at 11:40 pm

    I think that when the show first started it was great. I watched every episode in awe at what their lives were like and couldn’t imagine how they do it. Now the show seems to have a fake feel to it and it is really a shame. I really like the show and they seem like a great family but what actually started the show was the realness of the show and somehow now that is gone. Very sad

  7. Tara said,

    March 26, 2009 at 7:00 pm

    Knowing Kate, and her confirmation of how much she loves her current job, I don’t think this was the end. It’d take a lot for Kate to give in and give all this up. Don’t you think? She’s not one to just quit and fade away forever…

    Jon used to have a real job. Maybe he needs to go back to work. Men tend to need a career they’re successful at. I doubt he sees the show as his “job” the way Kate does. It seems to me, even if they didn’t need the income, it might be better for Jon to work again.

    I have a feeling there’ll be another season or at least part of a season. If they end the show, it’ll be a bigger deal then this last episode. This is TLC’s biggest most popular show! I just can’t imagine they’d let it go so easily.

    I guess we’ll see!

  8. March 25, 2009 at 11:55 pm

    […] went on to complain – and don’t get me wrong, I’m really very sympathetic toward him – “If I go out, people know I go out and photograph it and do everything they gotta do […]

  9. Gerry said,

    March 24, 2009 at 7:54 pm

    I think Jon just needs to face reality. They moved to protect their kids from over zealous fans, their helper (nanny) doesn’t want to be filmed, they block out their license plates and other location revealing billboards on the show for one reason, privacy. If you have a series on television and go out on the town, then allow someone to take your picture, duh, it’s going to end up on the internet (especially if it’s between two college girls). Thing is, Kate’s been traveling for the family business, I don’t recal seeing pictures of her with college boys looking toasted, if not baked.
    I knew the series would come to an end, I just wish it were on a better note. I hope they can resolve their differences and come back for another season, but if not, their marriage and the happiness of their children is most important. Either way, they gave us a season finale that left everyone guessing.

  10. March 24, 2009 at 7:08 pm

    I had an awful feeling after last night’s episode. And yes, the body language said it all, even when Kate was with the seven – she seemed very happy to be without Jon. I hope there isn’t a split, but if there is, I hope Kate doesn’t look back with regrets. Jon is very special.

  11. avagacser said,

    March 24, 2009 at 12:14 pm

    It totally did seem like a series finale. I know Kate wants to continue doing the show because it’s making them enough money to afford eight kids – and their college educations – but I hope she seriously considers Jon’s feelings. Hopefully there’s a happy medium here somewhere. But they’re right – there’s no going back to a time when people didn’t know who they are. They’ll always be “Jon & Kate Plus 8,” just like William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy will always be Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock. Just look at how hard it was for both of them to accept that.

  12. Tiffany C said,

    March 24, 2009 at 12:03 pm

    Was it just me or with the signing of the set last night did that seem more like a series finale? It broke my heart seeing them do that! Hopefully they will just be getting another set and they will for sure come back for season 5 🙂


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