“Blue August”: Stare deeply into Ian Somerhalder’s eyes

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Unlike all of my posts, which I try to make as articulate and well-thought-out as possible (I think), I’m writing this one totally on the fly.

Imagine walking along the beach, minding your own business and stumbling across THIS. {thud}/Photo by Planet Green

Why? Because I can’t go another second without reassurance that I’m not the only one out in Internetlandia (which is somewhere near “Portlandia”) who is drooling uncontrollably over this:

Be. Still. My. Beating. Heart.

I’m not sure which scenery is more gorgeous. Seriously, could they find a bluer ocean to match Ian Somerhalder’s amazing peepers? (Which, for the record, makes a mall in North Jersey pale in comparison.)

I just happened to see this commercial this rainy afternoon during a marathon of cheesy “A Haunting” episodes. (Honestly, is it me or do they use the same house set for every single episode? But I digress.) Planet Green is showing the same jaw-dropping “Blue August” promo during every single commercial break, guaranteeing I won’t be changing the channel anytime soon.

Smart move, Planet Green.

So obviously I’m all over this special. But wait, it’s not exactly a program you can DVR – or even watch live. From what I can discern from this confusing Planet Green press release, Ian is the *host* of a week-long series of programs beginning next Sunday, Aug. 21, at 8 p.m.

That’s right: You can’t just tune in at a particular time and watch Ian as he traverses the rain forest and witnesses the hatching of adorable – and, sadly, endangered – leatherback sea turtles on the beaches of Trinidad and Tobago. (All while wearing a pork pie hat, no less.)

Planet Green is no dummy, no sirree. It wants your attention for longer than an hour at a time.

So if you want to behold Ian in all his casually hip, environmentally conscious, non-vampirey glory, you’re going to have to tune in diligently ALL WEEK LONG.

Says Planet Green: “Throughout the week, Somerhalder will appear on-air and online via a variety of visually striking short-form features filmed on location in exotic natural locales.”

Which basically sounds like super-hot, Ian-infused commercials will be inserted into the network’s block of “Blue August” programming, which airs from 8 to 11 p.m. EDT Sunday, Aug. 21 through Friday, Aug. 26.

I’m clearing my DVR off as we speak.

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