“Dog the Bounty Hunter”: Trouble in paradise?

So it looks like there are problems aplenty brewing in Dog’s house.

All in the family: Dog, from left, Beth, Duane Lee, Leland and Baby Lyssa./Photo credit A&E

The Dog, of course, I’m referring to is Duane “Dog” Chapman, star of the A&E series “Dog the Bounty Hunter.” I’ve stumbled across some stuff online recently that’s got me worried that there is major trouble in paradise.

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Movie theater etiquette: Rude people please stay home

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Inspiration strikes me at the strangest times.

Welcome! Come in, have a seat. Please keep your mouth shut and your cell phone off.

Take this particular post, for example. I was in bed last night, ready to power down my cell when I stumbled across a tweet relating to a post about movie theater etiquette. It’s sheer brilliance on the part of the author, Matt Singer, a film writer for IFC. He had me at his post’s subhed: “Help us take back movie theaters from the a-holes of the world.” Matt has also started a petition – which I signed and hope you do, too – in which people promise to be on their best behavior in movie theaters.

I’ve witnessed and been subjected to enough thoughtless, annoying people that this subject couldn’t come at a better time. I’ve been to a couple of movies in the past two weeks, and I think we could all use a refresher course in public courtesy. During a weekday matinée of  “Rise of the Planet of the Apes,” a friend and I witnessed a mother and father (who sat down in front of us) who couldn’t keep their young son quiet (he yapped through the entire movie), another father who had the exact same problem with his young daughter, and an adult male who kept flailing his fists against his chest (like a Jerseyfied King Kong, if you will), causing our entire row of seats to shake violently.

Clearly DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince were right: Parents just don’t understand. To quote the Pet Shop Boys, what have I done to deserve this? If you know your child has a hard time keeping quiet, why don’t you sit in a section of the theater where you won’t be a nuisance and a distraction to anyone other than, you know, yourself?

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